Chapter 21
Eloise:
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The soft creak of the infirmary door pulled my attention away from the glass window overlooking the incubation room. I had my arm
wrapped around myself, knowing that she, my little girl, was supposed to be in my arms rather within the enclosed room that she was
- in.
Ivana stepped inside, her presence a quiet comfort amid the cold sterility of the space. Her footsteps were light, deliberate, as if she
knew that any sudden noise might shatter the fragile grip I had on my composure. She smiled at me as she walked, and I took a deep
breath before tuming to face her.
“Eloise,” she said gently, offering a small nod as she approached. “I thought I’d find you here. I’ve been told that you’ve been refusing to
leave this place.”
I didn’t respond immediately. I didn’t know how to respond, at least, not to her statement.
“She looks so peaceful,” I murmured. “Like the world hasn’t touched her yet.”
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Ivana stood beside me, her reflection blending with mine against the glass. “She’s strong. More than you know. That is something that
you always need to hold onto. Our little infants are often stronger than we know despite them being
SO weak.”
A bitter laugh escaped me. “I’m not sure where she got that from. Certainly not from me.”
Ivana’s lips pressed into a thin line, but she didn’t argue. Instead, she placed a warm hand on my shoulder, grounding me. “I wanted to
talk to you about where you’ll be staying. I do believe that you know that you’ve stayed in the infirmary for a long time and that you are
going to need to leave.”
“I knew that the infirmary wasn’t permanent, but I believed that I would be going back to my own house. I mean, my family’s house.”
“No,” she agreed. “You need rest, Eloise. Real rest, in a space where you can breathe and gather your strength. But your family’s house
is not a place for your little angel to be growing. She is going to need to grow where she rightfully belongs.”
“Where do you expect me to go?” I asked, fearing her response. I wouldn’t want to be away from my child, but for her to be telling me
that I can’t take her to my home. No, I couldn’t be away from her.
Ivana hesitated, her thumb grazing over her wedding ring, a habit I’d noticed over the years whenever she was lost in thought. “We’ve
prepared your old room. We haven’t allowed anyone to use it, and I have instructed for new things to be brought for you. A bed, a new
closet, and a crib, things that your baby would need for her to grow,”
A strange mix of emotions welled within me, nostalgia, fear, relief, and something akin to sadness. “The room at the end of the hall?
The room that I grew in?”
She nodded. “It’s close to the incubation room. You’ll be able to visit Isla as often as you’d like. And being there, surrounded by familiar
things, might help you settle. And when it is time for her to be leaving the incubation room, she will have her place ready for her to be able to sleep.”
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I bit my bottom lip, a habit I had thought I’d left behind. “You think I’m falling apart. That is why you want me to be close.”
Ivana’s expression softened. “I think you’re holding yourself together with nothing but willpower. And I know that
can only last so long. I want you to be close, and it her right to grow within her father’s home. She is the daughter of the Alpha, and I
think you know what that means, Eloise.”
Her honesty stung, but it also soothed a part of me that had grown raw from pretending. I had spent so long convincing myself that I
was fine, that I could handle this, that I didn’t need anyone’s help. But I did. I needed something, anything, to keep me from crumbling.
“Okay,” I whispered, my voice small. “I’ll go.”
Ivana squeezed my shoulder gently. “Good. I’ll have one of the maids prepare some fresh linens. You’ll have privacy, and if you need
anything, just ask. You needn’t worry, I am going to be here, and by your side to help teach you. I was a first time mother too, I know
how hard it can be if you feel alone.”
I managed a nod, feeling the weight of exhaustion settle over me. “Thank you.”
She lingered for a moment, her gaze searching mine. “Eloise, this isn’t a punishment. You need to understand that. Dominic… he’s
struggling too. He is trying to accept the fact that he has a daughter and with everything being new to him, it is going to take time.”
A cold shiver ran down my spine at the mention of his name. “I’m not sure I care how he feels.”
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Ivana didn’t press further. She simply gave me a small, understanding smile and turned toward the door. “When you’re ready, I’ll walk
you there. I am sure that it is going to be a path that the two of us can take carefully together.”
As the door closed behind her, I let out a shuddering breath. My fingers gripped the windowsill, my
back at isla, her tiny form a beacon in the sterile room beyond the glass.
“I’ll be close by, little one,” I whispered. “I won’t leave you. I promise.”
turning white. I looked
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Gathering what little strength I had left, I forced my legs to move, each step taking me further away from the glass window and closer
to the room where my childhood still lingered.
The journey down the hallway felt like stepping back through time. The walls bore the same muted colors, the same worn edges where
years of hands had brushed against them. It was like nothing had changed, yet everything was different.
When Ivana reappeared at the end of the hall, I managed a small, weak smile. She opened the door to my old room, the hinges
groaning in protest, and gestured for me to step inside.
I walked inside the room, the number of memories that played in my mind at that given moment were countless. The room was bigger
than I remembered it to be, or maybe I was far too used to the small space that I lived in.
I crossed the threshold, feeling the air shift around me, wrapping me in the familiarity of a time when things were simpler. Ivana stayed
at the door, watching with a motherly concern that both warmed and unsettled me.
“I’ll bring some fresh clothes and food later,” she said softly. “For now, rest.”
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“Ivana,” I called out as she turned to leave. She looked back, her expression patient. “Thank you. For everything that you are doing for
me, thank you.”
Her eyes softened, and with a small nod, she closed the door behind her, leaving me alone with my thoughts and the echoes of a life l
had almost forgotten.
I sat on the edge of the bed, the mattress dipping under my weight. My fingers traced the faded pattern of the quilt, memories
bubbling to the surface, each one a reminder of who I used to be.
But as I lay back, staring at the ceiling, I knew that the girl who once lived here was gone. In her place was someone else, someone who had been hurt, broken, but who still had a fight left in her.
And for Isla, for my daughter, I would find the strength to use it.
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